Today

Today Gert and i started our auditions down the temple bar music centre. there was a queue around the corner, about 35 girls. Me and Gert sat at a table, Gert had a mocha, i didn't, and the girls would come on the stage and sing a bit, or dance, or what ever. Kris did the lights, but i suspect he was mostly stoned for the whole thing, cos he had the spots in the wrong place and the girls, bless, had to dance all over the place to try and follow the, bless.

So there's this one girl, and she's all right looking, petite i suppose you might say, and Gert is like, "what age are you love?" and she says.. "uh...fifteen", and Gert says, sorry doll, pack yer bag. So she's breaking down in tears and all, "why?" well, Gert says "you have to be seventeen", "why" she says, she looks really pissed off and i noticed there was a hi-ace parked outside and I'm hoping her old man or brother isn't gonna come in here with a pipe and wreck the place, but anyway, Gert does this huge sigh and waves his head around, "because that's the age of consent, darling" he says, like it's obvious, and the poor girl, bless, stop crying and greeting and just looks confused.

after we've seen all the girls, and it didn't take long, Gert looks despondent. "some of them were ok," i say. "they were all fucking munters," says Gert. Ah jayses, some of them could sing though, " i offer.

Gert sighs again. "it isn't about the singing." he walks off, so i had to chase him. He was supposed to pay me and Kris. I think Kris fell asleep. Anyway.

so gert owes me money, now the internet knows, and i'm not sure about our girlband anymore. i said we should have gone with a boyband. statistically they sell more records, don't they. i mean look at westlife. in fact, i wouldn't look at westlife for too long cos i'd want to brain one of them. the bloke with the potato face, you know, the gay one? anyway, gert was having none of that. it's gay, he said.

Went home, opened a bottle of sherry and got back to the script. I have an interested party in california, but it needs to be tightened he said. i'm thinking of directing it myself. i can't tell you what it's about, not yet. oh, you'll all see. Late on i'm going to whelans to see luke haines and the autuers, cos i went out with a girl about ten years ago who was in love with him, and she left me. probably not for him, but she left anyway, and it was all a bit suspicious, so i think i'll head along to that and maybe heckle him a bit. the pro's love that shit, keeps them sharp, doesn't it. darrrrrrrrryyyyyyyl, darrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyl. ha ha. lol. ;)